Hi, All! Well, here we are at the end of July, and I’m just now finally getting around to posting reviews for June. The end of June and the start of July were just filled with stuff, until past the middle of July, actually, so I fell behind — again. But, here we are, and I’ve caught up, and even got to use some good tech to give this review set a good image to share of Ladyhawke — so let’s jump in.
Highlights of the month include new and old fantasy films, the finals for seasons of both Midsomer Murders and Brokenwood Mysteries (two of my favorite shows; now I have to wait for more!) — as well as the final films in the original Tarzan movie series. Plus, my annual watching and review of films by the master, Ray Harryhausen. What are you waiting for? Read!
* – This film is not good. Avoid it unless you tolerate dreck well.
** – A flawed film. You may enjoy it if you like this genre or the folks in it.
*** – A good solid film. If you like this genre, you’ll probably like this film.
**** – A superior film within its genre. Thoroughly enjoyable.
***** – An outstanding film on many levels. A great example of its genre.
Note that some shows I’ve given a parenthetical star rating, usually adding (occasionally subtracting) stars, depending on how your amusement may differ from mine. I’ve explained the meaning in the reviews themselves. Mostly.
Moby Dick (1956) **** John Huston directed and co-wrote with Ray Bradbury this adaptation of the classic man vs. whale story by Melville. Gregory Peck is Ahab and Richard Basehart is Ishmael, and a lot of the footage was shot in the actual ocean (near Ireland). Ishmael signs aboard the Pequod to go whaling and see the world, along with his harpooneer companion “savage” tattooed islander, Queequeg. Little do either of them know that the true motive of Captain Ahab is to find and kill Moby Dick ,the white whale who took Ahab’s leg. I’ve heard people criticize this flick, and Peck’s performance, but I think he’s nice and creepy, and the atmosphere is good and the special FX serviceable to the story. Apparently, the original print was somehow sepia-toned with color, and neither of the current prints seems to capture that. The one I just saw muddied the colors too much; the previous one may have been too bright in ways, but at least it showed off the technicolor. Hopefully, the folks who on it can find a proper balance in future.
Midsomer Murders 25-2 Lawn of the Dead ***** Doctor Who alums Peter (The Doctor) Davison and Frazer (Jamie) Hines are grouchy old men battling over a lawn-bowling green. One is a returning champion, the other a judge who could cost his rival the championship. When one of them eds up dead, Barnaby and Winter have to navigate between personal rivalries, competing teams, past and present misdeeds, and possible corporate takeovers of the bowling green to make way for a housing development. A fascinating (for me) look into another British outdoor game that I didn’t completely understand, along with a compelling mystery and strong acting from the suspects. Davison and Hines are so unlikable that I didn’t recognize them at first.
Barefoot Contessa, The (1954) **** Humphry Bogart’s movie director character, Harry Dawes, dominates this multiple point-of-view drama about the sudden rise and precipitous fall of dancer/actress Maria Vargas (Ava Gardener). Despite the title, which sounds like a musical, this is another very good film about the dangers of Hollywood, fame, and fortune. The funeral at the start leads to flashbacks of Maria’s life and career. Thankfully, there is no romance between Dawes and Maria, rather a nurturing mentor and collegial relationship. But Dawes cannot protect the new starlet from a rapacious producer, predatory suitors (including Rossano Brazzi), and an uncaring system. Edmond O’Brien won a Supporting Actor Oscar for his role as a tycoon’s right-hand man. A surprise first-time viewing for us, and always interesting to see Bogart in color.
She (1965) *** Ursula Andress is Ayesha “She who must be obeyed,” the white goddess character in this Hammer adaptation of the H. Rider Haggard story. Three British men, played by John Richardson (Leo), Peter Cushing (Holly), and Bernard Cribbins (Job) are adventuring in the African desert when Leo becomes entangled with the cult of Ayesha, who believe him to be the reincarnation of her long-lost love. She is immortal, and she lures the group to her lost city to make Leo her own. Christopher Lee is the leader of the She cult. Despite a good cast and production, this adventure always feels a little bloodless to me. I like it, but I don’t love it. Andress was dubbed by the same woman who dubbed her in Dr. No and What’s New Pussycat, Nikki van der Zyl.
Giant from the Unknown (1958) *** Archeologists working in California are looking for evidence of a band of Conquistadors, who legend says raided the area. By chance, their digging around results in a storm that re-animates the leader of the Spaniards, a giant of a man (Buddy Baer), who then rampages through the area, kidnaps a pretty girl, etc. Despite the low budget and goofy science, this is a surprisingly engaging sci-fi horror film. There’s a great print on a new 4-Film Blu-Ray Set by Film Masters.
Jurassic World: Chaos Theory (S1) ***(*) Years after they escaped from the island, the kids of Jurassic World Camp Cretaceous are now college age, and the world they live in has been overrun by dinosaurs. (Just like the movie series.) Some of them are working with groups attempting to control the dinosaurs; some have gone their own way; and one, sadly, is dead — which has fractured the once-tight friends and seemingly scattered them across the US. Now, dinosaurs appear to be deliberately hunting the young heroes. The series main threat is that one of them might be the next victim. Though the death storyline didn’t sit great with me, there are plenty of dinosaur chases, and it’s nice to see the kids more grown up — and by the end, I was pretty happy with where it’s headed for the next storyline, thus the parenthetical bonus star.
Spider-Noir (S1) ***** Nicholas Cage is Ben Reilly, a Depression Era Spider-Man known as The Spider, set in a Film Noir 1930s world, slightly different from our own. (Thus, some elements from later than the early 1930s, including films not yet made and stars not yet stars.) Retired after a tragic accident, private eye Ben is sucked back into the world of the Spider when he becomes infatuated with catlike Felicia Hardy (LI Jun Li), who works for mob boss Silvermane (Brendan Gleeson). Plus, super-powered criminals are suddenly showing up. Could solving the mystery of their appearance lead to a cure for Ben? This is a cleverly done re-imagining of Spider-Man, based on the character in the Spiderverse films (and comics). If Ben seems like an amalgam of movie PIs, there’s a good reason for that. What the series and find out all the secrets. Though it’s also available in color, I recommend watching it in Black & White — at least for the first time. Geat fun!
Brokenwood Mysteries 12-3 Midnight in the Garden **** Coffee truck owner and regular comic relief Frodo wakes up one morning in a millionaire’s house after a masquerade party dead only to find the owner dead in the garden. The man was an art critic and dealer who had made a fortune and collected an eclectic coterie of friends and hangers-on, most of whom were at the party. Suspects for Mike, Kristin, and Daniel (with help from Gina, of course) have to sort out include a long lost relative, an old friend who thinks they fought together in WWI, a wayward “son,” secret lovers, and more. Of course, numerous people have secret pasts, including a forger and a spy, and the resolution has the kind of twists expected in this excellent series.
Frankenstein’s Daughter (1958) *** A town is being terrorized by a freakish monster-woman running amok at night. At the same time, a young woman, Trudy, has nightmares of being a monster. She lives with her scientist uncle, and neither one suspect that his assistant, Oliver Frank, is a descendant of Frankenstein, secretly using the girl in his experiments. He’s also building a monster (which, due to a low budget mix up both looks like and is played by a man, though it’s supposed to be a woman. Frank is the cause of local disappearances, natch, and as the police close in, its unclear if Trudy and her remaining friends will end up being victims or taken in for the crimes of Frank’s creation. This low-budget flick is better than it has a right to be, though the goof with the monster mask hurts it. The Trudy-monster makeup is much better, though, and the whole is entertaining.
Detour (1945) ***** Tom Neil is Al Roberts, a down on his luck musician trying to hitchhike his way to California to reunite with his sweetheart, who’s trying to make it in Hollywood. On his way there, he’s picked up by a jovial gambler, who unfortunately dies while sleeping in the car. For complicated reasons, Tom adopts the man’s identity, intending to dump the car and the lie when he gets to L.A. In sympathy, he picks up a fellow hitchhiker, Vera (Ann Savage), and things get worse from there. She new the dead man, and now blackmails Al to do join her evil schemes. A Film Noir classic, “fallen” director Edgar G. Ulmer makes this flick far better than should be possible for its meager budget. Great stuff!
Curse of the Demon (1957 Sven) ****(*) Dana Andrews’ Holden goes to England for a scientific conference debunking the supernatural. But before he arrives, one of his collogues dies in mysterious circumstances after being cursed by a self-styled warlock, Dr. Karswell (Nail MacGinnis). Soon, Holden runs afoul of Karswell, too, a wealthy man sho even plays a clown-faced magician for children’s charity. Holden and Joanna (Peggy Cummins), the niece of the dead man, discover that Karswell has slipped holden a paper with runic letters, the mechanism that “cursed” her uncle, too. Through a series of weird events, Holden comes to believe that maybe a demon is coming to kill him on the appointed date. But what can he do about it? Curse is the shorter, US version of Night of the Demon, which is a better cut and gets that extra star. Either way, though, it’s a great flick. And yes, it’s the source of “Dana Andrews said prunes gave him the runes…”
Shoot-Out at Medicine Bend (1957) *** Randolph Scott is Captain Buck Devlin in the Union Army who has mustered out and is on his way to the west with his Sergeant, John Maitland (James Garner), and private Wilbur Klegg, who loves drinking and womanizing, to join up with Deviln’s brother’s homesteading group. The trio arrive during an Indian attack where Deviln’s brother is killed because he was sold faulty ammunition. The army trio vows to go pick up the homesteaders’ new supplies and make sure the equipment is good. On their way there, though, the trios uniforms are stolen by bandits, who then commit crimes while wearing the uniforms as disguises. Our heroes are befriended by a band of Quakers, and then decide to masquerade as mild-mannered Christians while they scout out the town, which is lorded over by a crooked businessman. Western action and light comedy ensue. The cast, including Angie Dickenson, make it all work, but the film never becomes super exciting. Enjoyable, though.
Monster from Green Hell (1958) ***(*) A US rocket carrying experiments into space, including one to see what effects cosmic radiation may have on insects, unexpectedly returns to earth, crashing into Africa. A team of scientists assembles to rescue any dangerous elements of the rocket that might remain, never suspecting that the wasps inside have mutated into giant stop-motion monsters, turning the jungle into a Green Hell. This amusing low-budget SF flick is more fun than it should be, because of a good monster design, and sincerity. Yes, there’s stock footage, but it’s often cleverly used, with the giant bugs appearing to chase natives, etc. The new Film Masters blu ray (in a 4-fer set) also restores the original color ending of the film, for the first time. If you like these kinds of flicks — and I clearly do — you can give it that estra star.
Get Carter (1971) ***** Michael Caine stars as Carter, a mobster who returns home to Newcastle a very depressed English down at the time, to look into the death of his brother, allegedly a suicide. He soon becomes suspicious of the official verdict, as everyone there, especially the local mobsters, seem to want to get rid of him. Soon, this escalates from strong hints to actual violence but Carter won’t give up, not even when his own London mob sends a couple of boys to bring him home. Carter bulls forward, using any means necessary, while also trying to protect his niece. Because this is a 1970s film, there’s plenty of hard-boiled action and sleeping around during the quest, as well as a brutal and stunning finale. Great crime-revenge drama.
Man from Atlantis – Pilot (1977) *** In this pilot for the one-season TV series, terrestrial scientists find the titular Man from Atlantis (Patrick Duffy, pre Dallas) and think he’s some kind of a wreck survivor. He nearly suffocates in the air (like Namor, he grows weak out of water) until a clever woman scientist (Belinda Montgomery) figures out he’s an amphibian. Amnesiac when he is revived, the Atlantean, named Mark Harris, works with her to recover his memory. Meanwhile, a villain (Victor Buono) is kidnapping scientists to make an undersea kingdom to dominate the earth. Mark and the scientists discover the submarine city, Mark infiltrates it, and we have a Bond-style series of perils and a big blow off — on a TV budget. Entertaining and Duffy swims great.
Vampire Hookers (1978) **(*) A trio of US servicemen on shore live in the Philippines get mixed up with a trio of often-half-dressed vampire ladies posing as hookers and their leader (John Carradine) who lure people into their underground lair to drain their blood. The vamps have a flatulent Igor-like servant (Vic Diaz) who also aspires to be a vampire. There’s less sexy time in this film than you might expect, given the title, and the comedy is broad and doesn’t work a lot of the time, either. Still, the blu-ray and HD transfers are sharp and colorful, and if you like this kind of semi-sexy silliness, you can give it that third star.
Idle Hands (1999) ***(*) Teenage slacker Devon (Anton Tobias) is so lazy and oblivious that he doesn’t notice for a whole day that his parents have been murdered. When he and his burnout friends (Seth Green & Elden Henson), they conclude that Devon himself is the murderer. Or more accurately, Devon has a possessed hand that has taken over and done the killings. Soon, Devon’s friends are not only the hand’s victims but also zombie sidekicks in this amusing horror comedy. Devon spends most of the movie trying to court a girl (Jessica Alba) while trying to keep his evil hand from killing more people, and also trying to rid himself of the problem. If you like silly, gory fun, give this flick an extra star.
Tarzan & the Valley of Gold (1966) *** Mike Henry takes over the role of Tarzan (the last actor to do so in the original series) in this 1960s adventure flick. It stars with Tarzan very much in James Bond mode, arriving in Mexico and being ambushed by assassins in a bull ring. Eventually, the action moves into the wilds as our hero tries to stop an army of bad guys, led by a Bond-style villian, intent on finding and looting the lost Valley of Gold. Eventually, they find the place (the impressive ruins of Teotihuacan) and take the place over with modern weapons and a smallish tank. Naturally, Tarzan must stop the villains and preserve the native culture. A weird mix of Bond and Tarzan — Tarzan with a machine gun? — but some good moments.
Silencers, The (Matt Helm 1 – 1966) *** Glamour photographer and former spy Matt Helm (Dean Martin) is lured back into the espionage game in this first of the series of Matt Helm series. Since this is a lighthearted James Bond riff, a secretive supervillain (Victor Buono in yellowface) is planning to grab an atomic weapon and start a nuclear war from which he will emerge as ruler of the world. Naturally, there are many sexy women to distract Matt along the way, including Stella Stevens, who may or may not be in on the plot. Martin’s charm makes it all amusing, but I have to admit that the Mad Men-era old-boy world view is more sexist than funny nowadays.
Castle of Blood (1964) **** After meeting Edgar Allan Poe at an inn, a writer named Alan takes a bet to spend the night in a haunted castle, though none who have taken the bet have emerged alive in the morning. At the castle, the man meets a compelling woman, Elisabeth (Barbara Steele) who claims that her brother makes this bet every year to send her a companion for the night. But she isn’t the only one in the ancient heap, and soon, Alan finds himself beset by ghosts recreating the bloody history of the castle. This is a very spooky film directed by Antonio Margheriti, and even has a bit of nudity in the European cut. Later remade by the director as Web of the Spider.
Man from Atlantis 2: The Death Scouts *** Patrick Duffy returns as Mark Harris, the Man from Atlantis, in this sequel movie to the original TV series’ pilot. Here, people who look like a couple lost at see reappear as mysterious amphibians, similar to our hero. Mark and his scientist friends track down the couple who claim that they come from an Atlantean race from outer space, and Mark is one of them. Mark is torn between his terrestrial friends and the aliens, even when it turns out the couple may not be what they claim. This isn’t great, but its another honest 1970s attempt to bring SF to TV. If you liked the first, you’ll probably like this, though it reuses some props, sets, and FX.
Tarzan & the Great River (1967) **(*) Mike Henry returns as Tarzan in this flick that starts moving away from the James Bond trend of the last film and more toward a traditional Tarzan film again. Tarzan is called to Brazil by a friend to stop an evil jaguar cult. led by Olympic decathalong champion Rafer Johnson, that is terrorizing the local jungle natives. Soon, Tarzan links with a riverboat pilot (Jan Murray) and his boy sidekick (Manual Padilla), and our hero and his lion and chimp friend are headed upriver to the cult’s lair. The struggle between Tarzan and the cult leader at the end is good, but Murray’s ratty boat captain isn’t funny and seems completely out of place with his Borscht Belt mannerisms. I think they were trying for Bogart in the African Queen, but if so, it’s an epic fail. If you can stand that, or if you’re a series completist, give this the third star.
Inspector Ellis 1-1 Hanmore ***** Inspector Ellis (Sharon D Clarke) is a police trouble shooter sent to help clear up investigations of murders and crimes that are stalled and unsolved. Because she is a no-nonsense police officer (and perhaps because she is black), her arrival is often not welcomed by the local authorities that she’s supposed to help. In this first case of the series, Ellis is sent to clear up the death of a local teen found in a half-submerged car. It turns out, he took part in an after-hours, unofficial swim team party, where alcohol and possibly drugs were shared. Ellis must piece together not only the events that led to the death, but also help find a missing girl who knew the dead teen before she ends up dead, too. A strong start to this series of movie-length episodes.
Django the Condemned (1965) **(*) Pat O’Brien a.k.a. Django (George Montgomery) has fled charges in the US to work in Mexico as a hired gun. Mostly, he works for a slightly scuzzy general, protecting the man’s land from bandits vying for control of the territory. The general’s daughter gets mixed up with the nephew of a local landowner, who hopes to marry the young man’s sister to the general. When the nephew is killed, the sister convinces Django/O’Brien to find the killer. Though there are more than a few shootouts, and a bandit battle near the start and end, this spaghetti western is slow and feels more like a TV soap opera than the usual western. Like many follow ups, this is Django in name only. I don’t think the name Django is ever even uttered in the flick. Extra star only for pasta western fans.
Brokenwood Mysteries 12-4 No Return Ticket **** When a vintage train on its maiden voyage is stopped by a protester on the train tracks, everyone is so concerned with the protest that nobody notices the middle-aged bride-to-be dead on the tracks when the train gets back underway. Mike, Kristin, and Daniel soon discover a black rose corsage, a groom-to-be in serious debt, an ex-husband and an old friend with grudges, a daughter torn about the dead woman’s divorce, and of course, the people involved in the protest, too. Plenty for our team to sort out, plus some good bits for Brokenwood’s quirky regular characters. I spotted the killer early, but not all the twists.
Arizona Colt (1966) *** Gordo, a bandit chief, stages a huge jail break, releasing everyone inside so he can force the prisoners to join his gang. When they do, they are branded (literally), and anyone not agreeing to join is killed. But Arizona Colt, one of the escapees, refuses, and cleverly manages to elude the gang and flee. Our hero/anti-hero then spends the rest of the movie trying to outwit the gang and play both sides of the street. Eventually, he is caught in his deceptions, and his hands are badly injured, but he recovers in time for a big finale. This is a pretty standard but amusing spaghetti western.
Meteor (1979) **(*) At the tail end of the Disaster Blockbuster era, Sean Connery plays a scientist trying to protect the Earth from an impending meteor impact that will wipe out civilization if not all life on our planet. The plan is to use a secret orbiting nuclear stockpile to destroy the meteor, but when that won’t be enough, the US teams up with the Soviet Union, which has its own secret nuclear stockpile. Both sides claim they were preparing for this all along, and not merely engaging in Mutually Ensured Destruction politics. As the politics are being worked out, and the plan set up, precursor fragments of the meteor strike Earth, precipitating disasters of various kinds. Packed with Hollywood stars, this flick is hobbled both by an anemic pace and “toy boat” level special effects on the potentially Earth-saving missiles and even the meteor itself. Blame the studio for firing successive SPFX outfits and then never replacing the budget they’d already spent. I’m giving it an extra star for some ruthlessness with the all-star cast and because I like cheese. It should be an MST3K movie.
Gray Lady Down (1978) **** Captain Paul Blanchard (Charlton Heston) is on his final cruise skippering the submarine USS Neptune. During a party for the new commander (Ronny Cox) in foggy weather, the sub is accidentally struck on the surface by a freighter. The Neptune takes on water and sinks with all hands aboard. Though the crew remains alive, the crippled sub is stuck on the edge of an ocean abyss, and cannot resurface. Maverick naval captain Don Gates (David Carradine) is brought in with his experimental small sub, the Snark, to attempt a rescuel. Good suspense and submarine disaster events ensue. I didn’t know much about this flick, aside from the memorable name, before I saw it, but both my wife and I really enjoyed it.
Inspector Ellis 1-2 Calorwell ***** In a police station with a troublesome ongoing mob investigation, Detective Chief Inspector Ellis is called in to help solve the disappearance of a well-liked police detective. Ellis and her aide, DS Chet Harper (who was part of the local office in the last case), soon discover a hostile atmosphere in the station, and not just toward them. The local old-boy network iis tough on women police as well, including the missing detective. Ellis and Harper soon worry that the station may have mob ties, and that only escalates when the missing woman turns up dead. The ruthless woman heading the local mob, who’s currently free after a failed attempt to jail her, denies any responsibility. But it’s difficult for our heroes to know who, if anyone to trust in this case. Another strong police mystery.
Danza Macabra (1965 – Italian version of Castle of Blood) **** This is the same film as Castle of Blood, but has the extra nude scenes with the newlyweds who end up as ghosts. See the review of Castle of Blood from earlier in the month (June 2026). Good and spooky, and Steele is stunning, as usual. (She is not involved in the nudity. Sorry.)
Monster of the Opera (1964) **(*) The film starts with a long vampire chase sequence of a woman, Giulia (Barbara Hawards), but just when you think its reaching its climax (spoiler)… It’s just a dream. Giulia is actually temperamental the lead dancer of an experimental theater group, mostly women with a handful of men and a male director. The director has just acquired an old theater with a mysterious past and creepy caretaker. A few jazzy dance numbers later, it turns out there’s a patron (vampire) hanging around the place, and Giulia looks like his lost love. More dancing and screaming and chasing commence, with Giulia sometimes on the vampire Stefano’s side, and sometimes with her company. The vampire takes her to his world, where he has other victims chained, which is apparently inside a painting. She escapes but the vampire appears and puts the troupe into a Dance Frenzy! Will anyone stop dancing long enough to save everyone? This is a stylish “trapped in a theater” horror story with many women in skimpy outfits. I guess that passed for erotic back in the day, but it’s pretty tame now. A bit of (rare for the time) nudity might have helped. Fans of this type of thing — like me — can give it that extra star to move it from mediocre to amusing.
Time of Their Lives, The (1946 – Sven) **** Before they became so famous that they only used their own names as characters in films, Bud Abbott and Lou Costello star in this history-based ghost story. Bud & Lou are originally living during the Revolutionary War era. Horatio (Lou) the tinker is in love with Melody (Marjorie Reynolds), an indentured maid. Though the 2 hope to marry, they are foiled by Cuthbert (Bud), a British loyalist with designs of his own on Melody. When patriots Horatio & Melody are mistaken for loyalists and killed, they return in the modern world as ghosts to find the missing letter from George Washington that will clear their names and set history right. Of course, Cuthbert’s descendant and others may stand in their way… Released almost a decade after Topper, this story echoes some of the ghost comedy in that classic. Unlike most later films, here Bud & Lou are not working as a team, which makes the comedy less predictable. I really enjoy this.
Tarzan & the Jungle Boy (1968) *** Brazil passes for Africa in this third and final Mike Henry Tarzan feature, shot in immediate sequence with his previous two. This one again features Rafer Johnson as Tarzan’s adversary, this time as the son of a chief scheming to overthrow his brother to become ruler. There’s also a subplot about a lost Jungle Boy and a woman photographer trying to make a jungle photo essay. It’s a return to standard Tarzan adventures, after a brief flirtation with Bond-like action. Still there’s some good action at the finish, and I’m okay with Tarzan going back to his roots, because of course, California was never really Africa, either. Badly bitten by a chimp during shooting, Henry sued the producers and stepped away from doing Tarzan in the TV series (replaced by Ron Ely). This was the last in the long-running series of Tarzan films that started back in the silent era, and famously including the Weissmuller series. Henry is fine, but this is more a final whisper than a bang.
Patience (S2) **** The unexpected departure of the first series sympathetic captain gives our autistic heroine Patience new troubles adapting to life. The new captain is a hard-nosed woman who doesn’t intend to let a police researcher like Patience work on live cases, despite the rest of the force sticking up for ur heroine. That, a difficult romance for Patience, and array of tricky cases make this an interesting season. We get to learn more about Patience and the new captain, who is something of a foodie. Cases include a photographer staked through the heart, a lawyer shot dead in a boardroom, a Viking runestone, an autistic girl whose father is dead in a railway museum, and a hostage situation with an accused murderer, among others.
Midsomer Murder 25-3 Death Strikes Three ***** On a posh estate, a cuckoo clock murders a man who might have been stepping out on his heiress fiancée. Is it connected to the woodworking show, run by a possible heir to the estate, encamped on the grounds? Or might it have to do with the death of the estate owner’s baby and a maid who went missing years ago? It seems like everyone on the estate, the owners, their eccentric heirs, and the visitors has a motive for murder. As usual, DC Barnaby and DS Winter have plenty of suspects and murders to sift through, including a woman glued to a chair and a beheading. Great fun, as usual.
Inspector Ellis 1-3 Brindleton ***** Ellis and Harper come to a precinct where their help is, for once, welcomed, to investigate the disappearance of a couple on their honeymoon. There’s a mysterious “final recording” to sort out as well as a disembodied hand found near the couple’s abandoned campmobile. But the hand doesn’t belong to either of the missing people, so who did it come from? Despite the cooperative local police, our heroes are led through a merry woodland chase to track down the suspects and motives in this movie-length episode that finishes the first season of Inspector Ellis.
Disclosure Day (2026) *** Emily Blunt gives a superb performance as Margaret Fairchild, an on-air weather forecaster whose mind seems to be receiving messages from (outer space) aliens as the world teeters toward nuclear war. She hooks up with Dr. Daniel Kellner, a cybersecurity expert whose stolen files that prove aliens are real, and world governments have their technology, but have conspired to cover all that up. The pair and Daniel’s girlfriend, Jane (Eve Hewson), must flee from cybersecurity chief Noah Scanlon (Colon Firth) who is using alilen tech to take over people’s minds. Chase scenes ensue, as Margaret and company follow hints from a mysterious resistance leader and try to reveal the truth about aliens on Earth. While the film has exciting sequences, the “aliens reveal themselves” plot doesn’t make a lick of sense if you think about it (much like Close Encounters). Basically, this seems like a case of director Spielberg believing the mythology that he helped create 50 years ago. But really, if aliens are willing to let humans torture themselves and others to keep these secrets, at best those aliens are uncaring, but are more likely assholes. So, watch this for the performances and the ride, but don’t believe a lick of it — unlike the director.
Brokenwood Mysteries 12-5 Death Has Four Strings **** After a rehearsal of a Brokenwood ukulele band, one of the band members is found dead in his car, killed by a broken ukulele. The man was a prominent local developer, and also had been married to the leader of the band. The only reason she’d let him join the group was because he was one of the best players, though he was also being courted bu a rival ukulele band, specializing in heavy metal/rock tunes, rather than classical tunes for the instrument. Mike, Kristin, and Daniel must sort out if the man was killed because of the band, his love life, his work as a developer, or for some other reason. The big problem, though, is that all the possible suspects seem to have iron-clad alibies. But isn’t that normal in a Brokenwood mystery?
Masters of the Universe (2026) ***(*) When Eterna is about to fall to Skeletor’s troops, young Prince Adam is forced to flee into another dimension — Earth. But on his way, he loses the Sword of Power and without it, he cannot return home. More than a decade passes, but he only finds the sword just before his warrior woman friend Teela shows up to protect him from one of Skeletor’s minions. Together, they return to the conquered Eterna and join a secret rebellion. Adam, though, doesn’t know how to use the powers he’s inherited as He-Man. Will he have time to discover and master them before it’s too late? With designs based more on the cartoon series and toys more than the previous Masters of the Universe (which I love), this production looks great and the set pieces are action-packed fun. My wife, though, who knows nothing about the cartoons and toys found a lot of the story baffling, as character introductions are thin. If you liked the cartoons or can figure out the relationships quickly, give it another star.
Krull (1983) **** When an evil castle appears from space, the Beast within kidnaps the Princess Lyssa (Lisette Anthony) betrothed to the heroic young Prince Colwyn (Ken Marshall). Colwyn then assembles a D&D-type adventuring band, including a comic-relief wizard and (eventually) a mysterious cyclops to help him find the castle and rescue his lady love. Along the way, he picks up a magical five-pointed throwing-star like weapon, the Glaive, and faces numerous perils amid all the walking through the countryside, including the ubiquitous quicksand. One of the best of the 1980s S&S type films, I like this better now than when it came out. The stuff where it tries to be Star Wars (including the laser blasts) doesn’t work at all for me; they should have stuck to pure fantasy. It generally looks good, though the hero’s castle isn’t particularly convincing, and the villain’s space-castle lair looks like it came from a prog-rock album cover (which isn’t necessarily bad). James Horner’s music echoes his other work but tries to push along the slow parts. Derek (Thunderbirds, James Bond) Meddings’ special effects vary in quality. The real standout in the film is the Widow of the Web sequence, which features a glorious mostly transparent stop-motion spider as well as the most emotionally compelling acting in the entire film. Still, high marks for trying hard and being near the top of the 1980s Sword & Sorcery boom.
Legend (Theatrical – 1985) **** Tom Cruise plays Jack and Mia Sara plays Lili, the naive heroes of Ridley Scott’s fairytale epic. The beautiful pastoral land is threatened by Darkness (Tim Curry in amazing satanic makeup) and his goblin minions. When Jack & Lili unwittingly lead the minions to the last unicorns, the male’s horn is stolen, killing him, and Darkness takes Lili captive. Jack must then go on a quest through many perils to rescue his love and safe the world. On the way he teams up with an amusing band of fairy folk willing to brave the firelit darkness to help him. This film looks beautiful with amazing, otherworldly production values and a great score (in the theatrical cut, which I prefer) by Tangerine Dream. There’s also a director’s cut with a more classical score.
Your Highness (Unrated – 2011) ****(*) Danny McBride is Thadeus, the jealous younger brother of Fabious (James Franco) the heir to their father’s kingdom. When Fabious’ fiancée Belladonna (Zoey Deschanel) is kidnapped by the wizard Leezar, the brothers must rescue her before “the Fuckening” in which the stars will be right for Leezar to have sex with her. Then she will give birth to a dragon that will let him rule the world. During their quest, the brothers face monsters, are betrayed by friends, meet the great warrior Isabel (Natalie Portman), and basically have the kind of adventures one expects in a D&D game. But this movie isn’t just high fantasy, it’s also a bawdy comedy whose goofy aspects remind me of more than a few RPG sessions that I’ve played. For that, I love it and will rewatch it frequently (in either rated or unrated form). If you don’t have those kind of memories, or don’t like crude and sometimes juvenile comedy, you can take off that fifth star — and its entirely possible that you won’t like this film at all.
Scorpion King 3, The: Battle for Redemption (2012) *** Victor Webster takes over the role as Mathayas ,the Scorpion King, now without a kingdom and sadly with his queen from the last film in the ice box — er, I mean, dead. (I don’t much like that cliche way of making a hero single again, but it works out okay in this sequel.) Now wandering the countryside, Mathayas takes on an errand for a king to protect the village of an allied king from an evil warrior/wizard looking to create an unbeatable army using a magical tome. Naturally, we have storylines about friendship ,betrayal, and finding new love — and honestly, despite my expectations, I enjoyed this film quite a bit. Don’t write it off as just a quickly sequel.
Lazer Ghosts 2: Return to Laser Cove *** This is either a very short horror-comedy movie or a very long fake trailer, depending on how you look at it. In a sequel to a movie that doesn’t exist (and yes, the two spellings of “laser” in the title are deliberate), a cop investigates the death of his brother in the previous non movie, where he was killed by the ghost of Einstein — the original laser ghost. The young people who stopped Einstein last time must team up to stop Einstein before he can create the perfect (green) laser and rule the world. Or something like that. It’s a dead-on parody of cheap 80s/90s SF/H flicks — and long enough that you feel like you’ve seen the whole non-existent film. Who will rule the lasers?
Midsomer Murders 25-4 Top of the Class **** During a PTA video call, the strict headmistress of a prestigious (private) school dies on camera, and Barnaby and Winter must investigate how she was murdered on camera by a javelin. The dead woman was embroiled in a dispute over whether a scholarship student from a lower-class family should have been expelled. She also cancelled a popular fundraiser, and the school is heavy with internecine politics, including about who should be the next headmaster. Naturally, the murders don’t stop there, and — as in several of this newest series — Sarah Barnaby even helps provide clues that lead to the solution. Sad that I now have to wait for a new season to appear.
Brokenwood Mysteries 12-6 Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend ***** The final episode of this (2026) season of Brokenwood Mysteries starts with local entrepreneur Ray (a series regular) discovering the bloody corpse of a woman in his newly opened Italian restaurant. Also in the restaurant is his sister Trudy (also a regular) covered in blood. Despite Ray’s inclination to scall the police, former convict Trudy goes on the run, and it’s clear that her relationship will make Ray’s cooperation with our detective heroes iffy at best. Sure enough, this turns out to be a wonderfully twisty mystery involving the stars with many series regulars as well as new suspects of a woman who was not well liked. The great season capper concludes with a song that I liked so much I sought it out online, “Lucky Stars” by Don McGlashan, a tune that now graces my favorites list. Can’t wait for next season!
Animal World, The (Dinosaur Sequence – 1956) ***(*) June 29th is the birthday of my hero Ray Harryhausen, and I watch his movies all day. This year I started with Ray’s dinosaur sequence from Irwin Allen’s Animal World. The science of the whole film is dated since it came out, but the dinosaur sequences Ray did with his mentor Willis O’Brien remain a standout. The larger-sized dino puppets for closeups aren’t great, but the rest is top notch. If you can ignore that, give this segment that extra star.
Fairy Tales & Test Shorts (Harryhausen – 1930s -1950s) **** Before he had a big Hollywood career, Ray made a series of shorts to add to his portfolio, and later that he might sell to make some money. The most famous of these is his Fairy Tale series, done with his amazing stop-motion animation. Because of his attention to detail, these are well crafted family fun. I was lucky enough to see some of these models in person at a Harryhausen exhibit in Tucson, Arizona, earlier this year.
It Came from Beneath the Sea (1955) **** Ray followed up his hit The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms with another giant beast attacks film. In this one a giant octopus emerges from the deep to terrorize the sea lanes and the west coast of the US. By the time the monster tears down the Golden Gate Bridge, we’ve already gotten more thrills than in most monster movies. The film also features a woman scientist character, played by Faith Domergue, who holds up very well as a feminist icon. Unfortunately, only the colorized (supervised by Ray) version is available for streaming, but it’s still a flick to see.
One Million Years B.C. (1966) ****(*) Raquel Welch and John Richardson star as star-crossed caveman lovers — he from the rock tribe, she from the shell tribe — in this Hammer remake of the One Million B.C. with Victor Mature. Despite the fact that this film and a fur bikini launched Raquel to stardom, it’s Ray Harryhausen’s dinosaurs that bring the blockbuster energy here. We have a ton of them, battling both each other and the humans (who historically could not have been alive with them). But forget the history and just enjoy Ray’s amazing animation — and the skin on display if you want, too.
Mysterious Island (1961) **** Jules Verne’s original book was mostly a tale of survival in the mode of Robinson Crusoe and Swiss Family Robinson, but he also added in Captain Nemo, and that gave this film a springboard for the kind of things Ray Harryhausen excells at. In this case, the master animates a number of strange and giant creatures, from a crab to bees to a prehistoric bird and a giant nautilus. Plus we have all of Captain Nemo’s accoutrements, which compare favorably with the Disney Nemo of a few years before. If you want adventure, look no further!
Jason & the Argonauts (1963) ***** When Jason grows up, he returns home to overthrow the man who killed his father the king. But when he meets that king on the road, the tyrant turns him aside with the quest for the Golden Fleece, because prophecy says if he kills Jason himself, he, too, will perish. So, Jason assembles the greatest heroes in Greece (the Argonauts) and sets off into a world populated by the creatures of Ray Harrhausen including a bronze giant, harpies, a hydra, and a small army of animated skeletons. Filled with some of the most iconic special effects of all time, Jason & the Argonauts remains one of the greatest fantasy films of all time. Tom Hanks even said it was greater than Citizen Kane!
Deathstalker (2025) ***(*) The near legendary warrior Deathstaker wanders a land ruled by evil Dreadites led by a wicked sorcerer. When he gains an ancient amulet, he discovers getting rid of it is not so easy, and every villain and monster seems to want it. So, he teams up with a diminutive goblin-like wizard and pretty thief Brisbayne to try to make things right, But of course, things keep coing wrong, and an old enemy out for revenge is dogging his heels. This Deathstalker reboot/sequel is done very much in the spirit (and often in the style) of the gory Sword & Sorcery fantasies of the 1980s. It’s a lot of fun, and if you dug those, you’ll dig this, too, so give it another star.
Ladyhawke (1985) **** Mathew Broderick is Phillipe, a thief who escapes the dungeons of an evil bishop in a medieval fantasy setting. As he is pursued by the bishop’s corrupt men, he is saved by Etienne (Rutger Hauer) a master swordsman and former guardsman, now out of favor. Etienne travels with a hawk as his devoted companion. Phillipe travels with him, but at night, things change, and the thief finds himself in the company of a mysterious lady, Isabeau, who is guarded by a huge wolf. It turns out that Etienne and Isabeau have been cursed by the bishop and may never see each other. Details of the curse and trying to defeat it and reunite the lovers is the main story of Ladyhawke, one of the best fantasy films of the 1980s. Things that felt odd to me — like Broderick’s somewhat modern mannerisms — no longer bother me, though there are some FX and shots and music that just scream “the 1980s!” Worth seeing. Seek it out.
That wraps it up for June 2026! The monthly total is 53 films, series, and notable shorts — a few more than last month — bringing our 2026 Total to 264. Pretty decent for half the year. We should hit 500 at least, even if we don’t break any records.
NEXT MONTH: I get back into the swing of reviewing… Maybe. Because the World Cup is on, too, and I find myself strangely interested. Plus that family stuff I mentioned, which is having some effect, but I don’t know what. Tune in and find out. Be kind to each other!
Covid is still here — & other diseases we thought were licked are back — so YOU can still help!
Please… #VaxUp! #BoostUp! #MaskUp! And get your kids & family vaxed, too!
Let’s Make the World Safer for Everyone!
Remember, you can support this and all my other writing work, including Frost Harrow, Dr. Cushing’s Chamber of Horrors, Monster Shark on a Nude Beach (upcoming re-release), and more, by joining my Patreon for a couple bucks a month, or by dropping me a tip on my Ko-Fi page. Thanks!
Be the first to comment